Pingu Didn't Like The Grotty Old Pub

I was sorely tempted to put the 'pube' in the title and blame it on a typo, but that would have also oddly fitted the agenda. Yes, it would turn out that our favourite little penguin boy isn't all that he seems. X{P

So yeah, I am obviously talking about Tomski, (Yes Nin, I did totally rob your name for him. x{P) who I visited today, spending the majority of my money on transport. Throughout the trip I have decided that Coventry is possibly the most boring place on Earth. It was BLATANTLY a godsend that I ended up there to try and cheer the town up. :{P I am now going to do a tedious and irritating list of things that I did today, and I'm gonna make you read it and tell me it's amazing. :{P



-Chapter One-
Train Stations

I do NOT do trains if I can help it, but as it went, I couldn't. :{P You could tell that I didn't know anything to do with trains, when I couldn't find the STATION. I was running around the palisades for ages looking for an entrance to the station. Turns out it's down the fucking stairs! Then I went to several wrong platforms. Thanks for that Mr. I'm a security guard so I know everything. When I finally did get on the train I put Billy Idol on and gazed out of the window, only to realise that I'd actually accidentally stepped into First Class. (I though it was posh). I just relaxed safe in the knowledge I could act all panicky if an inspector got on and explain the totally honest mistake. :{P And I totally /didn't/ do the same thing on the way back. X{D

After I got of the train in Coventry, which poor child do I see but T.B. X{D He was staring at another train, seemingly expecting me to clamber out of that one, so I approached him and said “Personally, I don't think he's gonna be on that one.”

Luckily, I saw him straight away, but I had a back-up plan in case it was busy like in Birmingham. He would recognise the jester hat! :{P

Yeah...



-Chapter Two-
The Grotty Old Pub, Ikea and gagged women on the forbidden floor 5.

Stepping out of the train stations, we had to find our way back, which for Tommy boy seemed impossible. Heck, he couldn't even find him way out of the car park. X{P However, following his dad's badly-hand-drawn map we managed to get as far as the grotty old pub. I'm guessing Tommy boy didn't like it. X{P

We did finally make it past gypo's with guitars and the big circle called Coventry. We took a trip through the crack market with a fairground in the middle and ended up slap-bang in the middle of Coventry and it's massive Ikea. Be warned, the remaining paragraphs in this “chapter” will get vair odd. :{P

We got in, and we went to the lift, which told us that we could go to any floor apart from THE FORBIDDEN FLOOR 5! Wow... Very Harry Potter. Anyhew, we ventured up to the café and we heard a voice come across on the tanoy TELLING US WHAT WE WERE FUCKING DOING! However, the voice sounded gagged and we decided that she was on the forbidden floor five, kidnapped and forced to work from under an ornate Swedish lamp.

We got to the food place. CHEAP FOOD! I mean, I got chips, a hotdog and a bottomless drink of coke for under £2. However, we saw their incentive was quickly smothered by the fact that there were tables but NO FUCKING CHAIRS. Seriously, no chairs? In a FURNITURE STORE? What is the world coming to?

I later felt the need to go through a small hole in the wall that said it was reserved for the greatest people in the world. I hit my head. :{P

What else? What else? Oh yeah, We went to see a film, but fucked off 'cause there was nothing on, and we almost missed a bus 'cause a hobo collapsed in the bus stop. X{D



-Chapter Three-
The Grotty Old Pube. :{P

So, Tom's humble little abode. :{P Yeah...

We went to Tom's room, which is actually a lot smaller than it looks online. And guess what? I'm NOT in his favourites list. Hmmph. :P And let this be known to all of you, he is not as cute and as fluffy as he makes out! Alas, he is completely the opposite! He went on pictures of grotty old pubes. Ew Tom. Ewwwwwwww. :{P

His brother's videos are obviously so fake and hilarious, especially one of the epsidodes. :P Yes, the miss-spelling was purposeful. Ask Tom to link you and rofl at the kids doing stuff.

Also, it turns out, I can't play Mario Kart. :{P

Eventually we ventured back into town whilst meeting his brother and his homies. :{P He complimented my hat! I'm unsure whether to be happy or sad. :{P



-Epilogue-
Every War Must Also Come To An End Tommeh. X{D

Basically, we found our way back. Had something to eat and I fecked off.

Great day, made even better now by certain people on MSN. :) *Luvvage*